The First Step to Decluttering (when you're emotionally attached to your stuff)




The first step to decluttering is asking getting into the mindset of letting go.  I don't know about you, but I am an emotional hoarder.  Okay, not quite a hoarder like you see on TV, but I do hoard items that I have an emotional attachment to.  It doesn't even have to be for a real reason, other than I am so used to seeing an item that I cannot bear the idea of not seeing it anymore.  Things that are familiar to me make me feel good, which is why I think most people get overly cluttered in the first place.  We have issues "seeing" our clutter, but even when we do, if it contains something familiar, it's that much harder to get rid of.  

So, I have found a trick to get rid of even the most familiar of items.  Well, it's more of a little process than a single trick, and it goes like this: 


  1. Make a plan for your year.  Even if it's summertime or later in the year, make a plan for the rest of the year.  Every year I pick words that resonate with me to use as my guides for the entire year.  From those words, I make a plan for what to accomplish during the year.
  2. If you don't want to make a plan, then ask yourself these questions: "What am I into right now?  What will I still be doing in six months or the foreseeable future?"  
  3. Then, ask yourself of each item if that item either fits into your plan or your immediate future use.  If not, then out it goes.  You can rebuy something later if you need to.  I use the "GLANCE" method for this, which stands for "Good Look Around, aNd Committing Eagerly".  Meaning, I take a look and make a quick decision, and commit to it!  Get excited about your item finding a new home!  
  4. If you are really attached to the item, say goodbye to it.  Write a letter to include inside of it when you give it away or sell it.  Tell its story.  Or take a picture to put into an album later (which you probably won't do, but you'll feel better being able to have the choice to do it).  When I had two beautiful baskets from the foreign country my old friend gave to my family (where he was from), I wrote a letter inside and said "Thank you for gifting these to me back when I was a kid, but I no longer need them and thought that maybe you could use them or give them someone else who can.  Thank you so much!!"  After that, I never missed them again.  Saying goodbye is super important if you really love your items.  
I asked myself "Will I actually read these books in the near future?  Can I buy them again later?"  It was my beautiful collection of Gregory Maguire novels.  And the fact was I was never going to read for a very long time.  I am into dystopian, thriller, and fantasy books right now.  And have been for years.  So, there was no way I was going to get into reimagined fairy tales anytime soon.  Same goes for my vast collection of Jodi Picoult novels.  And out they went!  And I do not miss them.  Now I have room on my bookshelf, too!  For once.  

The same can be said for junk laying around.  We see it so much that it becomes a part of the background.  And thinking of getting rid of it can sometimes give you anxiety.  But ask yourself, does this fit into my near future vision for my life?  If not, out it goes.  Because you're making room for your life right now, not some future life in which you use these things.  Easier said than done, I know.  As I have a skirt and shirt in my closet right now that I've never worn, and I love them so much I refuse to get rid of them.  Even though I don't wear skirts or dress shirts.  But one day I may...right?  Probably not.  I am a dress pants wearer, through and through.  Oh, I know!  I will put them on together and see how they look on me.  They may look ridiculous, and if they do, out they should go, too.  If they don't, then maybe I'll make room in my life to actually wear them.  But letting them sit does nothing for me except allow me to make them part of the background of my life.  And nothing in our lives should be background stuff.  Well, not many things, at least.  The problem is when hordes of items become background stuff.  

So, take a good look around, and assess where these items belong in your life.  And then box up everything that does not resonate with your lifestyle at this time.  Then see if you can sell them, regift them, or donate them (in that order).  Any garbage or broken items, you can pitch (or recycle if you can).  

No offense to Marie Kondo, but it doesn't matter if something brings you joy if you're never going to touch it again (or not going to use it in the foreseeable future).  Because for me?  Everything brings me joy.  Emotional hoarding does not worth with Marie's style of decluttering.  But this does.  


Let me know below if this works for you and if not, then what does!  Because I am always interested in learning new ways to declutter and organize!  

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